Tag Archives: bankstain

Bank Stain

This post has got absolutely NOTHING to do with modelling. It is written by the Editor as the middle aged, annoyed with life, woman with an avenue to vent via her career, that she is.

Please do feel free to comment and PLEASE SHARE…

“Once again the BANKING system hasn’t failed to leave a nasty taste in my mouth today. In fact, not so much a nasty taste, more of a permanent STAIN.  Grr.

Not content with leaving me hanging on the telephone for over an hour, giving me false hope at the possibility of literally THOUSANDS of options. Surely one will help me? Nope, not one option applicable to me. Where is the ‘SPEAK TO AN ACTUAL PERSON’ option we all want? In fact, the ONLY option any of us want. And no, we don’t care how much that costs the BANKERS. Not one bit.

I set up my bank account over 30 years ago with a small birthday present of £2 given to me by my late Grandmother. My particular bank of choice was the one a ten year old girl would clearly opt for with a love of horses. And what other reason at the time should there be?

So I continued with this account, making no defaults, owing no funds, always keeping it up to date and within the parameters allowed at any time. I earned various benefits as a result of my flawless behaviour. And this was much appreciated. But in 2014 to say thanks for being such a long serving and loyal customer they changed my account to another bank. Cheers. Perhaps asking me first would have been a good idea? The first I knew of it was the change from ‘green’ to ‘blue’ on my internet banking screen. Everything else stayed the same, therein creating some confusion about the enormity of the situation. Apparently everyone in my ‘postcode’ got ‘automatically switched’ to the change of bank during a corporate take-over. How special that makes me feel. To be ‘automatically switched as a result of my postcode’. So intimate. So deeply personal. SO BLOODY INCONVENIENT. My POSTCODE doesn’t provide this change of bank within a reasonable geographic distance for me. Who did the postal code homework? Han Solo?

My unrequested, currently very much unwanted bank have subsequently argued that they wrote to tell me about this. Well I’m sure they probably did. But as a working mum of two small children also running a business, when do I have time to read what is immediately identifiable as ‘junk’ mail from my bank? I work from home. I receive a lot of mail. I don’t have time to open what appears to be marketing drivvel. I do everything online.  Largely because unless I visit a branch I can’t do anything any other way anymore. Ok, so hands up. I should have read my mail. But surely there is an option open to a loyal customer to resolve this? 

Well there is… just not a satisfactory one!

To switch back to my original bank, I would lose all my account benefits. My bank. The one I chose at the age of ten, with my beloved Grandmother. The one I have not only a financial interest in but a sentimental attachment to. I now stand to lose my insurances, account benefits, my overdraft facility. Everything. Even the account number I have imprinted on my brain after being a customer for so long. I don’t even get to keep that. I have to set up a new bank account in order to be back with my bank. What? The one I had in the first place. You see they don’t offer the benefits I have, on my account, that belongs to me, to new customers. BUT I HAVE BEEN YOUR CUSTOMER FOR THIRTY YEARS!

Set up a standing order. Ok easy. The bank will ring to confirm you are making this transaction. Please key in the code. Great. Well ring then. Hello? Why are you not ringing my phone? Sorry but we couldn’t connect to your telephone number which is completely accurate and there is no explainable reason, but anyway we can’t. Please ring this number to continue.

Sorry we can’t help you because even though you have answered every security question on the planet relating to your account that even the BANK don’t know the answers to, we can’t help you because you haven’t received the magic security number through the post we claim to have sent you a year ago.

FFS

I just want to set up a standing order. To pay someone. On a regular basis. Using my money. From my bank account. That I own. That I pay the bank for. Why is this so BLOODY DIFFICULT?

“You will have to visit your local branch in order to continue with this now as the banking system has ‘locked you out’.”

SUPER! My ‘local bank’ is over 30 miles away. I have LOADS of spare time available to go on a jolly to my ‘LOCAL BANK’ to sort out something that BELONGS TO ME that I AM NOT ALLOWED TO TALK ABOUT because I don’t have a poxy SECURITY NUMBER.

I have spent over a week dealing with the setting up of a direct debit for TEN POUNDS A MONTH. An entire week of my life, I will never get back. And all because the BANKING system will not acknowledge me as a human being.

Is it any wonder we are in the financial crisis that we are with such customer UNfriendly services and unacceptably time consuming procedures just to ACCESS OUR OWN INFORMATION.

Oh yes identity theft. Right. And other CRIMINAL activity. That’s why these security measures are in place. SUPER. So even though I am not a criminal, pay my taxes, abide by the law, work my arse off, pay my bills, live honestly and with integrity… I ultimately am the one to suffer.

Well cheers to everyone who has put the many good people in this and many similar frustrating situations. Cheers and thanks a lot. I tell you what might help though. If in the AUTOMATED BANKING system  the following option is provided:

‘To speak to an ACTUAL HUMAN BEING, please say FOR F**** SAKE’ or key in ‘FOR F**** SAKE’ after the tone. That would help. That I think would enable the majority of banking customers to save time, money and believe they are actually getting a service they are paying for.”

#justanidea #bankstain #bank

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